Wife Swap CullenMcErin Swap
by xXKayeRoseXx
Summary: Emmett is always playing pranks, we all know that, so why are we shocked that he signed the family up for Wife Swap? He enlisted the help of Jacob Black as camerman and together they got their family chosen. What does a family of vampires do when they are on television with humans? Normal pairings. Renesmee is ten, so she is fully matured, everyone else is as normal.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Renesmee's POV

"Really?" I asked with a raised eyebrow and Jake just grinned as he and Emmett looked at the envelope in my hand with the return address, RDF Media, in type on the front.

"Come on, you know it'll be fun, Ness." Jake walked up and wrapped his arms around my waist, then looked down at me with giddy eyes.

"Easy for you to say. You and I are both part human. Everyone else isn't."

"I was a pawn in Emmett's game." Jake pouted and I rolled my eyes, looking over to Emmett.

"Aunt Rose is going to kill you." I informed him and Emmett suddenly lost his grin, obviously not having thought of Rosalie and her wrath. "Rose." I said softly, calling her back to the house from the backyard where she and Mom were playing chess. When Mom beat Rose she got angry so they had to play outside; Rose tended to be a sore loser.

"What is it Nessie?" Rose asked and I smiled at Emmett.

"Why don't you tell her what you did, Uncle Emmett?" I said in a teasing tone, knowing I could get back at Jake later, but wanted to watch Rose's explosion first.

"What did you do?" Rose looked at him hard now and he shrunk back a little.

"I love you, Rosie." Emmett approached her. She held him at arm's length and he handed her the letter in his hand I'd handed over to him. He seemed reluctant but she snatched it from his hand and began reading through it.

"What the hell! Family meeting! Now!" Rose exclaimed and every one was in the living room watching what was going down, except Grandpa Carlisle who was still at work.

"Why did you need to call a family meeting?" Jasper asked with his hair tousled; Alice was only wearing a silk bathrobe. We all knew what was going on up there and it had used to make me gag a bit, but I had gotten used to it and learnt to tune it out.

"RDF Media." I stated simply and Rose handed the letter to Grandma Esme dramatically.

"What is it?" Mom asked.

Grandma was staring at the letter wide eyed, then began reading, "Dear, Mr. Carlisle and Mrs. Esme Cullen, your family has been selected to appear on the reality television show Wife Swap after we watched your family on the video you sent to us. We would like you to call us upon receiving this letter and the following day we'll send out a camera crew. Please do not postpone your reply. We begin the swap on May 22."

"Who did this?" Grandma asked.

Emmett and Jacob looked down guiltily and Dad growled, "What the hell do you think you're doing putting us on reality television Jacob?" ignoring Emmett's involvement because we were all used to Emmett doing stupid stuff. I swear if I ever spent a moment away from Jake, Emmett got him to buy into whatever stupid plan he had brewing in his brain at that moment.

"I only held the camera." Jacob held up his hands innocently and I was thankful I remained under Mom's mental shield anytime I was around Dad because I really wanted to pounce on Jacob at that moment. Jacob coughed and I realized I was sending him mental images while holding his hand. I sent him a sorry and he just chuckled, making Dad glare a little bit more because I'm sure Dad was reading what Jacob had received from me. I could normally stop my gift from projecting, but sometimes I forgot.

"Way to stick together." Emmett mumbled. "I vote we all blame Alice because she didn't tell you when she saw it in her vision."

"I didn't tell them because you bribed me with tickets to fashion week!" Alice glared at Emmett.

"Well, it's not my fault you're a shop-a-holic. Maybe this new mom will send you to rehab," Emmett threatened and I groaned at how childish my aunts and uncles could act from time to time.

"Shut up!" Grandma exclaimed and everyone did automatically, not used to her being the one to explode. Normally Dad had the anger issue. "Sit." We all obeyed Jake sitting on the ground and my following, sitting between his legs. Mom and Dad sat at the piano bench. Rose and Emmett sat on the couch and Jasper sat down in the recliner with Alice perched on the arm. "Now. Guess what we're going to do until Carlisle gets home?" We all waited knowing not to speak when she was mad. "We're going to sit here in silence like the children you are."

"But we didn't-" Alice began, but was silenced by Grandma's raised hand.

"You did Alice. You saw a vision of it and didn't tell anyone. And I know you told Jasper."

"Well, we didn't do anything," Mom said and Grandma nodded at her.

"I would bet Edward has read it in their minds, and whether he told you or not doesn't matter. Sit. Quiet. If I hear a word Alice you're getting your shopping privileges taken away, Emmett, Jasper, and Jacob you get your video game privileges taken away. Renesmee you get your art supplies confiscated. I'll take away your tools Rosalie." Rose looked aghast and crossed her arms huffing. "Edward you get your music taken away and Bella your books. Does everyone understand?"

We all remained seated and quiet for the next three hours. What a way to spend a Saturday. I kept sending Jacob pictures of random things we should be doing, and then changed it to a picture of my window locked. He looked down at me with confused eyes and I sent him the words, '_I'm not happy with you. You're not staying over tonight._'

Jake pouted and pulled me into him wrapping his arms around my waist. Dad coughed as he pressed his lips to my neck and bit it lightly. I nudged Jake with my elbow and he just grinned winking at Dad. I sighed quietly. Grandma was back in her garden, but she was listening for us to make any noise.

"Why is it so quiet? This is unnatural," Grandpa said when he walked into the room; I distinguished Grandpa Carlisle from Charlie by calling Grandpa Charlie Pa-Paw, even though we weren't living in Forks anymore; we were living about a hundred miles south, in Oregon. The only sounds were mine and Jacob's breathing and heartbeats. Other than that everything was silent.

"Remain silent," Esme said as she walked into the living room, wiping her hands on her pants before kissing Grandpa and handing him the letter.

He read through it then seemed to reread it in disbelief. "Who did this?" Grandpa asked seeming more flustered than I'd ever seen him. Emmett slowly raised his hand. Jake remained with his arms wrapped around me until I sent an elbow into his stomach for not saying anything. He slowly raised his hand just as guiltily as Emmett. "Why would you do that? You both know the danger that puts us in."

"I'm sorry Carlisle." Jake apologized and Carlisle nodded.

"Thank you Jacob. Now Emmett. What elaborate excuse do you have prepared this time for your stupidity?"

"We need a little fun around here and I think a human will shake things up really good."

"Well I see no way to get out of this at this point unless Esme doesn't want to do this because she'll have to go into a human home." Emmett's eyes got wide, obviously not having thought of that.

"I'm fine with it. I enjoy human company sometimes, but I need to know that all of you kids will be fine with a human in the house," Grandma said.

"I know I will be," Dad said kissing Mom's neck showing he remembered when she was human and he handled that.

"And I will," Mom said. With her super control over impulses even when she was a newborn Mom would be okay.

"Of course we will be," I said of me and Jake.

"This is gonna be fun," Emmett said.

"As long as she isn't too ugly," Rose muttered.

"We'll be fine. Right Jazz?" Alice asked.

"Of course we will. I'll even work on emotions if I have to."

"Then it's settled. Now Emmett do you have this video you sent in?"

"Of course. It's hilarious," Emmett chuckled and got the video popping it into the player.

We began watching with what looked like Carlisle sitting in his study. The camera flew in a semi-circle landing on the wall of the hall and the 'cameraman'; AKA Jacob Black, began walking. The voice on the video wasn't Carlisle's, but instead Emmett's trying to disguise itself as Carlisle's. "Hello. Who you just saw was me, Carlisle. I am the patriarch of this house."

Carlisle grimaced at Emmett's butchering of his accent. "I work at the local hospital and enjoy reading and old English art which is the decoration of my study. Religion is a strong subject I enjoy studying and have found I have some things about several religions that I can understand. We are very open to our children making their own ideas up about the world, so we do not make them do anything they dislike, including attending church.

"My wife Esme enjoys gardening and is the most beautiful and perfect mother to the kids whom are all adopted. She also does interior design jobs from time to time when she wishes and refurbishes antique furniture." Grandma smiled at Emmett's sucking up and he grinned triumphantly as the camera came to Rosalie fixing the car.

I heard gagging that sounded like Jake as Emmett's Carlisle impression said, "Now this is my beautiful, eldest daughter Rosalie she came to our family with her brother Jasper, who we will speak more of later, three years ago. She is very obsessed with her looks, but she is very good with cars, quite a skilled mechanic, working on the family cars even when they don't need it. She is a senior in high school along with my other adopted son, Emmett, who is quite the avid sports fan. Esme and I allow them to date since they are not related and Emmett only came to us a little after Rosalie. He and Rosalie both enjoy sports, whether watching them or playing, and he is the resident clown, making everyone smile and have a good laugh when we're too uptight." By the end of Emmett's talking Jacob had moved the camera away from Rosalie and Emmett and was filming the Porsche's engine, obviously tinkering on it as his hand is several shades darker than even mine being the darkest of my family; admittedly I was still extremely pale compared to most people.

Rose paused it and glared at Jake who hid his face in my hair. "How dare you gag and turn the camera away from me during my spotlight mutt?"

"No derogative terms," Grandma warned taking the remote from Rose and pressing the play button. We could cuss, well when Dad didn't try to kill me for it, but the terms mutt and leech were off limits. I had actually ignored Jake for a week, a feat that had almost killed me for using the term leech around me once. I had got very offended since I am I half-'leech'. He had been referring to Rosalie as a 'stuck-up, self-absorbed leech'. I had no problem with any of it except the leech part. To be honest the rest was true.

The camera continued to Mom reading a book, Wuthering Heights it appeared, while Dad played her lullaby on piano. "This is Edward, my first son. We believed he was gay until Bella came along. She was adopted most recently and admittedly we had worried she might be lesbian with her immediate attachment to Alice who we'll speak of in a minute." Mom and Dad both growled at Emmett who was laughing loudly. "Edward enjoys playing piano and has an extensive music collection of artists who were dead before he was born," That joke received a couple smiles from us even though Emmett was doing a good job at being rude and setting it up to make fun of the rest of us. I hoped Jacob's involvement in this project would at least mean I got teased a little less, but I doubted Jake had any say aside from camera angle. "Bella enjoys reading and playing chess. She is one of the few people who can beat Edward in chess. They are both scholars, also known as know-it-alls amongst the other children."

As the camera travelled through the house we waited to see whether it would be me and Jake or Alice and Jasper it landed on. It was the latter two. Alice came on camera with Jasper building a giant house of cards under the staircase as was per usual when Alice wasn't shopping or they weren't locked in their bedroom. "This is Alice and Jasper. They're a couple, but they aren't as showy about it as Rosalie and Emmett who are very physical." We all cringed thinking of that no matter how used to it we were. "They both enjoy the childish pursuits of building card houses and Lego cities to which Emmett gets chased around the house for destroying when he is feeling mischievous. Alice is a shop-a-holic who may need thera-"

"Emmett! Jacob!" Alice exclaimed standing up from the card house causing it to blow over.

The camera went black with only the voice of Emmett's Carlisle saying, "Jasper is Rosalie's younger brother, and Alice is Bella's best friend. Alice is very outgoing, while Jasper is more reserved and overly polite always using yes ma'am and no sir."

The picture on the camera came back and it was Jacob and I lounging around listening to music. I was lying on my stomach on my bed and Jake was sitting on the floor at the foot. His hair was just a little shaggy and I was playing with it as I sang softly in his ear the lyrics to a song we had been listening. "Finally this is Renesmee and Jacob." Jacob looked over to the direction of the camera and winked. I turned a little slapping Jacob in the back of the head as we watched the video.

'_You're really getting it now,_' I sent to Jacob and he buried his face back into my hair nuzzling my neck. '_You're not getting off that easily._'

"Renesmee was my first daughter, Edward's sister. She and Bella are quite close due to Edward and Bella's recent engagement. The overgrown man that looks older than he is is actually only twenty and Renesmee is seventeen, so even though he appears to be in his mid- to late-twenty he's really not such a pervert as you might think."

"I didn't see this part," Jake growled and Emmett just continued to chuckle.

"Renesmee enjoys spending most of her time playing with her dog Jake who might be gone for filming if we get picked and listening music like her brother Edward, only more contemporary music is her pick." I glared at my uncle for the dog comment, but he kept grinning like an idiot.

"Jacob is not one of our adopted children. He lives in the guest house and Renesmee sometimes stays with him as they have a mature relationship." I blushed bright at that and turned my face to hide it in Jacob's chest.

"This was our family. I hope you enjoyed us and we hope you pick us to appear on your show." The scene ended with the camera on the entire family, including Emmett and Jacob who were smiling at the camera while the rest of us were clueless. It cut off and Carlisle stood back up taking it out of the player and handing it to Emmett.

"You're all dismissed. Esme and I are going out. Be ready for cameras tomorrow and remember to practice acting human."

We all dismissed; me and Jacob retreating outside. I travelled at a vampire speed walk ahead of him until we reached the lake three or so miles from the house. I turned on Jacob when we got there with a glare. "Before you kill me let me try and explain."

"Thirty seconds," I said.

"Well. It was Emmett's idea."

"Restart. That isn't valid."

"I only held the camera."

"Not valid," I repeated and Jacob quirked his eyebrow making me smile. "I'm looking for something a little more personal."

"Oh! I love you, Ness," Jake kissed me and I smiled.

"Good mutt."

"Hey. No using derogative terms. Remember?"

"I'm allowed to when you act like one. You know this could put us in danger. I mean really Jacob."

"You know you'll enjoy it," Jake grinned and sat down pulling me with him. I landed on his lap with an '_oof_'.

"I'm going to miss Esme. I've only ever been away from her a couple days when we visited Forks and La Push." We had done so for Billy's funeral. It was the first extended period I'd ever spent away from my family; only Jacob and I went.

"I know, and I'm sorry I didn't think of that. I just heard Emmett's reasoning of it being fun and I agreed. I didn't expect we'd actually get picked."

"When are they ever going to get the chance to find another family as weird as ours?" Of course we'd be picked. They thought we were crazy, incestuous kids. We seemed creepy to the outside eye.

"And they don't even know the half of it."

"Oh? Would it be considered odd that the ten year old hybrid vampire, human is dating the shape-shifting twenty-six year old?" I asked sarcastically and Jacob scowled.

"I hate telling you this, but shut up. I can't stand hearing that. I am twenty at this point apparently and you are seventeen."

"In this town that's what we are," I smiled.

"You know, I love you so much."

"And I have to love you to stick around your big goofball ass." I slid away from Jacob and laid down with my head in his lap, his legs Indian style under me. I watched the sky as Jacob played with my hair. It got dark sometimes while we were out there, so we were going to head back to the house, but I stopped and said, "Hey. Let's just go back to yours so we can actually get a good night of sleep." Esme had taken our move as a chance to build Jacob a house on the property a little ways from the main house. Only within the past year had I been allowed to start staying at Jake's because Mom and Dad had agreed I was growing up.

We'd been together since shortly after my seventh birthday, three years ago, when I reached full maturity, but unlike the rest of the couples in our family we weren't married. Dad had made Jacob promise not to propose and me not to push for anything like marriage until I had lived eighteen years. I respected my dad enough that I agreed and Jacob was just glad Dad hadn't tried killing him yet, but I really wanted to be with Jacob. At this point I wouldn't have married him yet even if he did propose.

Before I even heard Dad's rule I had decided I would finish going through real high school at least once and get at least one college degree before I married Jake. I only had a year of high school left, which had proven to be quite easy since I already knew everything, including French, Spanish, thanks to Carmen, and Latin which the Romanians had taught me upon visiting when they had come back to see if the Volturi had made a move against me again.

"You know I'm all for staying at my place." That meant he would actually have a bed long enough for him since he stood six-foot-seven inches tall, dwarfing Renesmee's five-foot-five height.

"Hey. Slow down," Renesmee said as Jacob expected her to burst into vampire speed now that they knew where they were going. "I want to just walk with you. It's beautiful out here."

"Never as beautiful as La Push." Jacob looked up at the sky and Nessie stopped him seeing the tear in the corner of his eyes that he wiped away.

"I hate seeing you sad," Nessie said kissing the tear that escaped Jacob's eyes unchecked. "What's wrong?"

"I've been thinking and my dad isn't going to be the only one I lose. Most of the pack has stopped shifting. They aren't going to live forever. You can tell they're aging and I'm not. I'm staying the same. I mean, Quil is waiting to start aging when Claire is older, and Sam already has. To be honest it scares me."

"Do you ever regret you imprinted on me? That you couldn't have a normal life and fall in love with a normal girl who you could age with?"

"Never have I once regretted imprinting on you Renesmee." I knew he was beyond serious when he used my name instead of my nickname. "You're the reason I live. I love you more than my life."

"Corny, but I love you anyways."

We returned to Jake's house and he grabbed a bag of chips from the cupboard. I crinkled my nose, still not a fan of many human foods. "I'm going to bed. Goodnight. Brush your teeth before you come to bed," I warned Jake because I hated kissing him after he ate human food unless he brushed his teeth. Fruits were one of the few things that appealed to me because they were sweet, but not so sweet as the horrid candies Emmett and Alice had tried feeding me when I was younger.

I was in one of Jacob's t-shirts and my boxers almost asleep when he slid into bed beside me. I was under the cover, but came out from under them when Jake lay down since he was plenty of warmth. I snuggled into his chest happily and soon we were both asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer- I do not own any of the Twilight characters. All rights go to Stephanie Meyer and whoever else has the rights. The McErin's are, however, entirely mine and held under my own copyright.**

Chapter 2

Maysen McErin's POV

I was checking the mail when I found a letter from RDF Media. It was the letter Mom had been waiting for since she sent our video in. My only hope for this was that the new mom wasn't as polished as mine. We put on such a front as the perfect American family when we weren't. We obviously weren't the worst off, but I still don't think anyone could see through the exterior of the pastor and his 'perfect', loving wife, the choir director, and their 'perfect' daughter who made straight-A's and was a cheerleader while heading the 'Spread the Word' club at school. It was all so much of a front. I didn't want to do any of that.

I would have loved to just up and run away with my boyfriend, whom no one knew I was seeing, but I couldn't do that because I was sixteen and he was twenty-one. Mom would never condone that when she thought me and Richard Johnson had something going on. Richard she did condone wholeheartedly because he was the 'perfect' guy. He played football and basketball and never missed churched; the perfect guy to my mother.

What no one knew about was the metal illnesses Mom possessed or the ones that I'd inherited. No one knew Dad spent his time with the church secretary because he said he couldn't stand even looking at Mom. They slept in different bedrooms and only saw each other on Sundays and Wednesdays for church, so we could still seem perfect. I had no idea what would possess Mom to broadcast us to the world, as though bringing another Mom into the picture would make us seem more perfect. Dad 'worked' all day; that was the excuse for the affair. He spent hours in the church writing sermons and speaking with God. Mom chauffeured me and my little brother, Bradley, to whatever she deemed good, Christian extracurricular activities.

I walked to Mom's bedroom where she was bathing in the darkness with a cool cloth over her eyes. She had had a breakdown that morning and I had to skip school, but she had still made me videotape several hours of me practicing cheerleading to make sure I was still the 'best'. That was what made Mom happy; when we were the best.

She hadn't eaten a thing since the day before, then only because it was Sunday and Sunday meant you had to eat. I heard her puking in the bathroom the previous evening after the church supper. She claimed her body was naturally thin, but I knew that wasn't the truth. It was the same problem I had. We didn't eat and it was simple as that. I had learnt something from Mother after all I guess, I thought sarcastically.

"We got a letter from the Wife Swap people." I handed it to her and waited to be dismissed.

"You may go, but ready the house for cameras. They come tomorrow and I don't like the mess you leave this house in."

I gave up arguing about it not being my mess long ago and just said, "Yes ma'am."

I returned to where Bradley was whining about  
wanting food and rubbed my temple. I took him to the kitchen for dinner since  
Mom was having one of her breakdowns. I cooked for him, not eating anything  
myself. I never ate if I could help it; part of a granola bar every once in a  
while if I passed out too often or couldn't do my chores and extracurricular  
activities. Maybe half an apple, but that was it.

The day went as normal until I was tucking Bradley in to bed and singing him a lullaby. When I finished I walked to my room, locking the door and finding a blade that had been taped underneath my table I slid it across my leg watching the blood begin to rise, then pool as I cut again, and again, and again in the same spot making it deeper every time. I took solace in making myself bleed. It proved my control as with not eating. The not eating helped with cheer too. I would be kicked out if I gained any weight and Mother would get mad if I got kicked out of anything, so I starved myself and cut the pain away. It was just how I coped.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Renesmee's POV

"God! You two are such children. Get up!" Alice's voice was coming from the kitchen and I sat up, Jacob following suit.

I looked at the clock and saw we'd overslept; it was already noon. "Ready for this?" Jacob asked and I nodded.

"You didn't leave me much choice," I mumbled and Jacob pulled me to his side squishing me a little but causing me to laugh more than anything.

"I smell eggs," Jacob said sniffing the air after a couple seconds. "and bacon, and toast. Let's go eat."

"I'll pass. I'm hunting after the camera crews leave today with Mom. She wants to talk to me away from the house."

"Okay. That should be fun," Jacob whispered in my ear, kissing my neck before Alice knocked. "Don't come in."

"Get decent then!" I blushed at Alice's assumption and Jacob laid his head over on my chest.

"No," He said stubbornly sounding quite childish.

"Excuse me. Let me rephrase that. Jacob, get decent. Nessie make sure you're ready to be dressed and camera perfected."

Now was my turn to say no. "Just give us another ten minutes," I prompted not ready to get out of the comfy bed and be separated from Jacob for Alice's primping session. I didn't hate fashion as much as my mom, but I didn't have anywhere near the appreciation and passion Alice and Rose had for it, mostly Alice in that department.

Alice opened the door against our protests, but had her eyes covered. She hated not being able to see Jacob or me in her visions and it made it harder for Dad to spy. I knew that for a fact. Alice had told me that Dad had told her once he wished she could see us in her visions, but that he also was glad because that meant he only had to see things he didn't want to in Jacob's mind.

"You can uncover your eyes, Alice," I finally said sighing and heaving myself out of bed. Jacob remained sprawled out until Alice pointed to the door and he got up walking out like a dog with his tail between his legs, no pun intended. "Nice job selling out," I muttered.

"Here. I already picked your outfit out, so get dressed." Alice left me to that while dancing into Jacob's closet and choosing him clothes he probably would refuse to wear or didn't even know he owned. I dressed in the dark-wash skinny jeans and put on the jade green top that hung loosely off one of my shoulder before grimacing and taking it off.

"I refuse Alice," I stated simply and she was immediately in front of me glaring.

"You're almost as bad as Bella," Alice huffed and yanked the shirt over my head. "You're wearing it."

"Jacob do you not even care your girlfriend is being murdered?" I knew I didn't need to raise my voice above the usual volume for him to hear me with his enhanced hearing.

Jacob was in the doorway soon and said, "I can't stop her. No one can." Jacob paused, then said, "I do, however, think you look better in my t-shirt."

"I like your t-shirt better," I agreed which gave me an idea. I grinned and turned to Alice. "I'm fine with this as long as I don't have to wear the shoes."

"But the shoes perfect it," Alice argued. I glared with contempt at the six-inch, green, peep-toe stilettos. "You'll be able to kiss Jacob without a stepladder."

"You can't reach Uncle Jasper with a step ladder," I muttered.

"I have to go and make sure the rest of the family is dressed well, but Jacob you had better wear what I picked and Renesmee, you had better not take those heels off."

Once Alice left I took an old jacket that Jake only had for show and shrugged it on. It was a thick work jacket and it smelled like Jake even though he only wore it on extremely cold days when he had to pretend to be cold so we didn't become suspicious.

"I think I'm just going to start wearing your clothes from now on," I told Jake and inhaled the woodsy scent that was Jacob.

"I'd be absolutely fine with that," Jacob said and pressed his lips to my head.

"Get dressed before Alice comes back," I ordered and began brushing my hair in front of the mirror on the wall. It kept getting snagged, but eventually it was back to its naturally wavy state. I was glad the ringlets had lost some off their bounce because I hated them. I liked the waves better. Jacob was behind me within minutes and had one of my curls wrapped around his finger. "Let's go," I said, but Jacob stopped me and pressed his lips to mine. We kissed for a moment before he took my hand and we ran back to the main house.

Everyone was wearing green or black with few other colors and I grimaced. "Alice this is tacky and you know it."

"I agree this time," Rosalie said. "Esme, Bella, Nessie, come on. We're overthrowing Alice on fashion choices this time." We all happily followed, Mom the first one. I noticed she was in a dress that looked like it belonged in a gala not a pretend to just be going about your house day while cameras watch you.

I ended up in the black t-shirt Jake had put on after he rejected Alice's assigned outfit. It was huge on me and I wore that with my Converse and Alice's jeans so she would feel a little better. We all came back downstairs in what we would normally wear, except Jasper who had stayed with Alice. She looked like she would cry if she could and I immediately felt horrible, but knew we had to stop Alice sometimes even when it hurt her feelings.

There was soon a knock at the door and I watched Grandma stand up to answer it. Jasper had returned everyone's emotions to neutral so they could sort themselves out, something he had begun doing instead of actually projecting specific emotions onto us, so we weren't quite so stressed.

We were all seated like we had been the day before for Esme's lecture, so the first thing the cameramen saw was a bunch of couples in various places around the room. Dad had been playing around with a song he'd been writing, but stopped once the cameraman was in the room. He visibly winced and I knew he was reading something in someone's mind he didn't want to hear.

I cuddled closer to Jake and he wrapped me tighter in his arms as I shifted uncomfortably under the look in the cameraman's eyes. His eyes ran over my body and I heard a growl emit form Dad's chest, reading his thoughts. I blushed getting the idea of what they were.

"Okay. Since you're all here already I'll go over what you need to do and then we'll get to filming."

"Actually my husband, Carlisle, couldn't get off of work. He works at the hospital and can't very well call in for that."

"That's fine. We'll see if we can send a camera over later and talk to him for a little while or something," the camera guy said. "I'm Ryder, by the way. The rest of the crew should be in here in just a minute, but while we wait I need to get all your names." He began pointing at each of us and we said our names. "Are you going to put a shirt on?" The guy finally asked Jacob who shrugged seeming to think about it.

Alice grinned and walked at a fast human pace upstairs. She tossed a shirt over the rail at me and said, "Nessie, you're wearing that and Jake you can wear your shirt that Nessie is wearing. Go." Alice came back downstairs and Jacob and I both headed for the downstairs bathroom.

"Nessie," Dad started to say, but I stopped him.

"I'm wearing the shirt Jacob is going to wear. We can't go to different places in the house and-"

"Go," Esme said shining her indulgent smile on us.

Jake and I walked to the bathroom and I gave him his shirt back. He pulled me into a kiss before I slid on the new shirt. "Behave," I whispered against his lips.

"What am I, a dog now?"

"As long as I've known you you have been, and you're quite the obedient dog."

"You know if I weren't a shape shifter I would be offended by being called a dog."

"Come on. I wanna get this over with then we're going to spend the night at your place."

"You know I love not having to go to school," Jacob chuckled.

"Even though it's weird that you're claiming to be older than my parents," I said.

We walked out hand in hand and Dad continued glaring at Jake. We sat back down and the camera guy blushed a little. I realized my hair was messed up from changing shirts, but that wasn't what the cameraman was thinking. I tilted my chin up as Jacob ran his fingers through my hair, playing with it as was habit.

"Okay. Now just go about your day as normal and we'll record for two or three hours."

We all did what we'd normally do only at non-vampiric speed. Dad and Mom went to the piano, Mom with a pencil in hand writing as Dad played piano. Alice and Jasper were under the stairs discussing what to build, a Lego city or card house. Rosalie decided to go work on fine tuning Mom's Ferrari and Emmett stayed put ready to make fun of us until Rosalie called him too low for the humans to hear. He followed her then and Jacob and I stood up. We headed outside to the backyard and I jumped on his back so he'd give me a piggy back ride. I wrapped my legs around his waist and we walked across the bridge in the backyard out to the meadow that we'd made when we'd moved to the new house.

I laid on my stomach while Jacob laid on his back and we just talked. "I don't like that camera guy. He gives me the creeps."

"I don't like the way he looks at you," Jacob agreed and sighed. "Speak of the devil."

"Wha-" That's when I noticed the camera guy walking across the bridge and groaned laying my head down on my arms. "I really hate you sometimes Jake."

"You never hate me," Jake said and took hold of my hand squeezing it.

"Excuse me. Strongly dislike."

"Hey. I guess you didn't hear what we told the rest of your family, but I just want you to know you should act completely normal. Don't watch what you say or anything. It's fine to say anything you want and just do whatever you do. I need you to introduce yourselves to the camera first, though." We both nodded and did so.

"I'm Renesmee. However everyone calls me Ness or Nessie. I'm seventeen."

"And I'm Jacob; I'm twenty, no matter what Emmett tells you about my age." I smiled at that and laughed lightly.

After our introduction to the cameras we were told to continue what we'd been talking about.

"I wanna do something tomorrow after you get out of school," Jacob said.

"I can't. Alice wants me to go shopping with her in Portland."

"Buy something sexy," Jacob whispered in my ear and I blushed, hoping the camera didn't pick that up, but I knew it didn't because even Jacob could talk lower than a human. It was because he had werewolf hearing.

"Shut up," I mumbled and kissed him. I was just going to peck his lips, but Jacob pulled me back in and I willingly went with it until the guy cleared his throat and I moved away guiltily. Dad was going to shit if he saw this on camera. I placed my hand on Jacob's neck and sent him the words, '_Is your goal for Dad to kill you for making out with me on camera._'

Jacob shook his head, but kissed me one more time. "I think we have enough of you two," Ryder said once Jacob and I were silent for several minutes, me sending things to Jacob and him replying with comments too low for human ears.

"I hope we didn't bore you too much," I said smiling softly and Ryder began blushing again. I laughed softly and he hurried back to the main house. I looked to where Jacob was glaring after him and reached my hand up from his neck to his cheek and stroked it while sending him, '_The guy is just human. It's nothing to worry about. Human guys flirt with me all the time._'

"And I don't like it when they do, but this guy is going to be in the main house all the time. I don't want you getting hurt."

'_He's human. He couldn't hurt me if he tried._'

"I know, but I like looking out for you."

"I love you." I said aloud and in his head.

"I love you, too, Ness."

When we heard the camera people leave Jacob and I headed back for the house and Mom and I headed out to hunt.


	4. Chapter 4

*A/N- The Cullen's in the last chapter were filmed on a Sunday, and the McErin's are being filmed on a Tuesday. Just want to clear that up. I wish I could write longer chapters for the McErin's, but I find there is less to say about them since they are such a smaller family. I'll try to start writing longer McErin chapters from now on, once the swap actually starts. Love that I'm getting reviews like I am. This is my first fan fiction to post on this website and I'm glad you're enjoying this. I will keep writing. This will not be a short story, it will be full-length. And now I let you read the chapter instead of boring you with an author's note.*

Chapter 4

Maysen McErin's POV

"The cameras are here!" Mom exclaimed clapping her hands on Monday when Bradley and I got home and Dad looked up from the paper in front of him. He was home because Mom had made him stay. He wasn't happy about it. "Hello," she welcomed the cameramen and ushered them in. "Come in."

"I'm Jackson," the guy introduced himself and I rolled my eyes.

"Go get Bradley, Maysen, doll," Mom said and I did so knowing not to argue with her. I found him in the backyard playing and took him upstairs, changing his clothes. When I got back downstairs Mom nodded her approval and I sent Bradley to her.

"You'll just go about your day. Introduce yourselves when the camera comes to you."

Dad went back to his paper and mom went into the kitchen beginning the meal Dad had asked for. He believed it was the woman's job to be in the kitchen and to clean. Mom cooked and I did the rest around my activities.

"We'll start with you," Jackson told me and I nodded.

"I'm Maysen. I'm sixteen, almost seventeen and I now have to get to my chores." The camera followed me as I began sweeping before leaving me to find Bradley who was practicing soccer in the backyard as he did every day, soon her would be practicing some other sport and I'd still be cleaning because that was a 'woman's job'.

When Mom finished the meal she came to me and said, "Come along Maysen. Bradley hurry up." Mom ushered us to the car and the camera guy stopped us.

"Where are you going?"

"Maysen is going to gymnastics and dance, and Bradley is going to karate then soccer. Tuesday's are a slow day for us." The guys eyebrows raised at that and he nodded.

"Well, we're only going to film a little then we'll save the rest for later." Jackson followed us and he departed filming Bradley while the woman with him filmed me. Mom dropped Bradley off then me, being the part of a perfect Texas cheer mom even though I didn't have cheer that day.

"Why are there cameras with you Miss McErin?" Coach Murphy asked.

"We're on Wife Swap. Mom signed us up."

"Okay, but I'll need to talk to them about what they can film. You know I can't have people getting a sneak peak at our state routine." We were finally going to state in gymnastics and I understood what Coach meant, so I nodded and got Mom and Melody, the camerawoman.

I changed into my leotard and began stretching with the other girls sitting a bit separated as always. Our gym was split in half, one side was gymnastics and the other was a weightlifting area. I was stretching when I saw Joel begin lifting weights. He winked at me and I smiled.

This was one of the few times we saw each other now that we were setting up for state in gymnastics and we were working on two competition routines in dance. The only thing that wasn't six days a week was cheer now that we were out of season. We still practiced twice a week and I saw Joel for short periods when I could escape on Saturdays or I spent lunch with him during school.

"Girls come here," Coach Murphy said and we all stood.

Practice went as usual and I made my way back to the locker room with the rest of the girls. Joel had went to the guys locker room two minutes before; the guys and girls locker rooms were beside each other, so after all the girls went in I went around the corner and found Joel.

"Hey, beautiful," Joel said kissing me and I smiled.

"I don't know if I'll be able to see you these next two weeks," I said and Joel raised his eyebrows.

"Why? I'm sure we can find some way to see each other." It would be so much easier if Mom and Dad believed in cell phones, but they don't.

"Mom signed us up for that show Wife Swap and we're going to have cameras following us around."

"Well, maybe the new mom will let us see each other."

"I hope. That would be amazing. You know I hate sneaking around."

"I don't exactly like it either. I wish I could walk right into the middle of the gym and just kiss you."

"But we can't," I finished what Joel was saying and kissed him. "I have to go."

"I love you."

"I love you too." We went our separate ways and the monotony of a normal day ensued.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Esme's POV

Each of the kids hugged me, Renesmee clinging for just a little longer. I wrapped my arms around each of my children; that is what they all are. They are my children and Renesmee is the granddaughter I had resigned to never having. Even Jacob hugged me before returning to Renesmee's side. "I love all of you." The camera was watching and I had already given the children the rules for the swap. "And you. I want you to plan an excursion to Isle Esme for two weeks after I get back from the swap."

"Yes ma'am," Carlisle kissed me and I smiled. "I love you."

"I love you more," I hummed against his lips then pulled away when Emmett started singing, "Carlisle and Esme sitting in a-"

"Say one more word and you and Rose will be put into different rooms so you can't K-I-S-S-I-N-G," I warned and Emmett shut up, pretending to hide his six foot five muscled frame behind Rosalie's five-foot-nine inches. They really did act like children sometimes. I was kind of happy about that. Emmett and Jacob's antics got a little old, but they made me feel like a real mom, and I hadn't felt like such a mom before the wolves. I could cook for them like any normal Mom might. I do admit I wasn't such a fan of the smell, but I liked being the person I could have been only with a more amazing family.

"I love you Mom," Emmett sucked up and hugged me.

"I love you too Emmett," I hugged him back and each of the children hugged me a second time.

"You have to go. You'll miss your plane if you don't go," Tina, the camerawoman who was supposed to follow me, said.

"Okay," I agreed and kissed Carlisle one more time. I walked to the car and everyone came from the house doing their best to remember to walk human speed, Alice having the worst trouble with it as she was used to just jumping off the stairs or over the railing too fast for human's to even completely discern. She slowed her pace by holding fast to Jasper's hand and letting him set a human pace for her.

I got into the cab and waved at my family as the cab set off towards Portland. I'd get on a plane from Portland to Oklahoma City, then another flight from Oklahoma City to Texas. I had gotten hats and wraps so my skin wouldn't show. That was the thing I was most angry at the boys about this. They hadn't thought of my being sent to one of the sunniest states in the US.

I was a little uncomfortable on the plane, but not for long once I got used to the proximity of so many humans. I stared from the window and listened to the people around me snore, listened to their conversations until I began feeling guilty, and simply stared out the window the rest of the duration of the flight.

When we touched ground I was swept up in airport traffic and tried my best to breathe as little as possible. I enjoyed being around humans from time to time; they interested me, but it was hard. I had hunted with Carlisle before leaving, but I was worried about letting myself smell so many humans in such a chaotic place that for me to do anything might not even be noticed until security cameras were looked at.

I hurried to the luggage carousel, keeping a human place as best I could. Breathing helped me keep pace because I matched my steps and breathing. It took me a moment to remember that there was a cameraman following me from a distance. I hadn't been thinking of that to be honest. They had put him several rows behind me on the plane and now as I got my luggage he grew closer. I began breathing slowly, knowing if I didn't I would look suspicious.

"Ma'am, I'll show you where to go," Joseph, the cameraman, said and I nodded.

I followed Joseph to the waiting black car. I got in the backseat after putting my luggage in the trunk and was thankful I had worn long-sleeves, an ankle-length skirt, and a wide hate that covered all of my skin. It scared me that I'd been sent to Texas, of all places. During the summer, nonetheless, so my wearing so many clothes would seem even odder.

"How do you feel about this swap?"

"This is going to be a shock I'm sure. I'm so accustomed to the cold, but maybe Texas will be good for me. I am very cold-natured, so I'll probably be the only person in long-sleeves and pants all the time." I looked out the window and saw a beautiful square; courthouse, huge Victorian-style buildings and such. "These are beautiful," I whispered.

He prompted me to tell him about my career. "At the moment I only do odd jobs for family friends, but I refurbish antiques and do architecture which if my daughter's boyfriend shows you, you can see I built his house. These buildings are amazing architecture. I adore how beautiful this courthouse is, and a church on every corner. My son Jasper is from Texas," I said and smiled softly remembering the stories Jasper had told me about it. He had always said even back then it was beautiful; rolling plains and prairies in one part and desert in another, just a couple miles away.

Things change so much over time, and I honestly love it, yet miss some of the old. I miss being human sometimes, but that is very seldom. So much less often since Renesmee was born; I got to have my grandchild.

As we drove we finally drove up to a house surrounded by a small field. It was wood, painted white, and above the door was a sign that said, '_Welcome, May God watch over you_,'.

"The house looks normal from here. It's a little boring, but it feels homey enough so far." I continued to look around talking to the camera that followed me. "Wow. They have a whole book shelf full of Bibles. That's impressive. My husband enjoys reading the Bible every so often, but we have multiple different religions portrayed throughout our house. I don't want to say anything about this, but I just get the feeling it's a bit oppressed here." I don't know why I kept talking. I should have stopped, but I could honestly feel the oppressed feelings that marinated within that house.

I found a room that was filled with trophies and began reading what they were for. "I don't know how many children there are, but there are karate, dance, cheer, gymnastics, soccer, football, and academic trophies here. It's rather amazing." I just wondered whether they got to do anything else. Did they get to have fun and have free time?

"I wonder if they do anything but these activities?" I pondered. "However maybe they enjoy doing these things. Accomplishment is a good thing."

I walked to the kitchen and sat down in front of the manual the other mom had written.

I read it aloud, "Welcome to the McErin household. May God bless you. My husband is a pastor at Jeffrey Baptist Church, and I am the choir director. I do not work separately of that due to my frequent headaches, but my husband does charity work separate from the church and through the church. We have two children, one girl and one boy, Maysen and Bradley. Maysen does dance, gymnastics, and cheerleading, and Bradley does soccer and karate at this time of year, but he plays football at other times of the year.

"We believe it is the woman's job to do the household work, but due to my health problems I sleep until eight, letting Maysen prepare Bradley for school, then drive them. After I drop them off I return home and sleep for a few hours, or relax. I begin cooking at noon for my husband who is seldom home during the day. All our meals are home cooked and you need to be very aware of that. I left several recipes for you, so you should prepare out of those. Maysen does the housework after school and Bradley practices soccer or karate, then I drive them to their practices, whichever those are on that day. You have to drop Bradley off first, so you can stay with Maysen. If she doesn't do perfectly at Nationals which are approaching she will have her designated one hour a week free time taken away; she knows this, but you need to remind her. On weekends Maysen practices in front of a camera for several hours before I review it. For every mistake she gets free time deducted." This seemed a little overbearing. One hour of free time, and that was taken away when she didn't do things perfectly. It amazed me a little bit.

"Bradley will wait outside for you at the karate studio and he will work one-on-one with his soccer coach during the extra time of Maysen's practices until we get there to pick him up," I continued to read from the manual. I read the rest and sat there to absorb the differences of this family and what I was accustomed to.

"I find this is going to be a culture shock more so than I believed. I understand she has frequent headaches, but I don't understand having her daughter do all the work. I know I for one don't agree it is the woman's job to do all the work." I did remember when that was a belief that everyone agreed on, but it wasn't anymore and while I enjoyed cleaning every once in a while if I asked Carlisle would gladly do it. I liked knowing he would do anything that would make me happy, even if it was something that wasn't very fun. "And I think it's amazing she's there for her daughter, but I feel like her or the dad should at least be there for the son sometimes."

"You need to go to the living room and wait for the family now," the cameraman told me.

I walked into the living room and sat down. I listened and heard as the car pulled into the driveway, then heard the three footsteps up the front steps. The door opened and a teenage girl walked in, followed by a small boy. He couldn't be more than five or so. Behind them was a tall man, as tall as Emmett, but a little less brawny.

"Hello," I said and shook each of their hands before sitting back down as they did. Maysen and Bradley sat on the couch beside me and the man sat down in a large recliner.

"I'm James," the man said.

"Esme. What's your name?" I asked the child I knew was Bradley.

"Bradley. I'm five." He held up his fingers to show me his age and I smiled at him. That was something I didn't have. Renesmee was never mentally five, so maybe I would be thankful the boys were giving me a chance to have this for two weeks.

"Well. It's nice to meet you Bradley. And you're Maysen?" I asked.

"Yes," Maysen said and her father cleared his throat. "Ma'am. Yes ma'am."

"How old are you?" I asked her.

"I'm about to turn seventeen, right after Nationals." I guess everything did revolve around their sports, even when their birthdays were revolved around sports. "We have the day off today. I did a quick makeup workout during school," Maysen said quickly like she was used to explaining herself.

This was going to be an interesting week.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Rita McErin's POV

My plane touched ground and I stepped out followed by the camera. I looked around the Portland airport and grimaced as I saw it was raining. I loved that it rained so little back in Texas, but from what I'd heard it rained horribly here throughout the year.

We began driving in the car; it was almost two hours before we reached the house. On the way we drove through complete desolation, but not the kind back home. It was miles and miles of trees; green trees soaked in rain. The car skidded on the wet road every mile or so and by the time we arrived at the house I was about to pass out.

"My nerves are fragile. I can't be riding in these conditions," I told the camera when we finally stopped driving in front of a house that was ten times larger than ours. This house was two stories and painted white. It sprawled over a huge amount of land. I got out hurriedly walking through the rain. When I walked in I stopped in my tracks.

"Tell us what you think."

"This house is huge. How big is a family that needs this much space?" There was a large grand piano and the backside of the house was stained glass. The only places to sit were a couch and a recliner which struck me as odd since it was such a big house. I continued walking through the house and found that the whole first floor was this massive living room, a kitchen, a study, and a bathroom.

"My husband would never condone the food this kitchen is stocked with. All I've seen is processed meat and chips." I continued looking through the kitchen. "And candy. Let's leave the kitchen. I think this is going to make me sick." The only thing I ate was lettuce because that had hardly any calories except for Sunday night dinners in which I had to eat whatever was cooked.

The study was lined in paintings and filled with books. "I wonder if someone works from home," I pondered. I walked to the desk and saw blueprints. Maybe the father did architecture; that would explain the huge house.

The study was the first place I felt a bit of religion. There was a cross above the door; it looked old, antique. I wondered how old it was? There was a large Bible that I was afraid to touch. It looked so old; the binding was coming undone and the cover was a thick paper. It had beautiful gold scripture on it that read 'Holy Bible'.

I walked upstairs to the second floor starting there. "This child is so beautiful," I whispered seeing the girl who was probably ten in the picture. She had bronze hair that reached her knees. She was in a white summer dress and was beaming at the camera. Maysen was never like that. She would never dress up like I wanted and she refused to beam at the camera for pictures. I wish Maysen had been like that. "I wonder if this is her now, or if she's older."

I continued looking at the pictures and saw one of a large native looking man with his arm wrapped around a small teenager who was over a foot shorter than her. The teenager in this was the same girl from the first picture so I said, "I guess I've been answered. I don't like this though. This man must be at least five years older than her in this." I shook my head. "She seems smart, though." I looked at the bookshelf. "She has all the classics." I couldn't find a Bible one, however. That upset me a little. "During rule change this will be the first thing to go." I held up a rock and roll CD. Rock and roll is the devil's music. "This music is horrible; it's the devil's way to children. I can't understand parent's condoning children who listen to this."

I walked to the room across the hall and found another piano. "This family has too much money. Two grand pianos, and this," I picked up a book to see the books on this shelf were the same as the ones on the bookshelf in the previous room. There were a couple that were different in each room, but they both had all the classics. "I'm disgusted by the money they seem to spend."

There was a huge music collection. I walked over to it and found everything from classical music to jazz to rock. "They can keep the classical music, but this rock and jazz will be going," I said firmly and continued to the floor below.

The other room was a bedroom. It had an antique chair in front of a vanity mirror and an antique trunk at the end of the bed. This room looked like the parents, so I continued on not wanting to invade their space. "Beautiful antiques."

I entered yet another room and this one was decorated with fashion magazines stacked precariously on a table and a laptop. The closet was larger than the room, so I walked in and saw that there was two racks with men's clothes and the rest was women's, and a small woman's at that. This room didn't strike me as the parent's, so I guessed it was siblings. I just didn't understand why such a wealthy family wouldn't be able to put two beds in a room.

I ignored it and said, "Too many material items. These clothes; they're all designer. I can't even imagine how much money they've spent on these. Some of these are too provocative. I know what else we'll be getting rid of."

The last room was the most unique. It had just as big of a closet as the previous, but the room had such an array of things. It had sports equipment and a whole wall that was just a mirror. When I looked at the bed I grimaced. "We're just going to leave this room right now." I had seen a bondage corset and it had bile rising in my throat. This house was anything but a good Christian home. I shuddered and we went downstairs.

"This home needs to be bathed in the blood," I told the camera and grimaced again at the stacked gaming systems in the living room.

I sat down in front of the manual in the kitchen and began reading aloud, "Hello, welcome to the Cullen household. I hope you enjoy our family; we are quite close though we don't spend too much time with each other. I want you to know all of mine and my husband's children are adopted. Jacob is not adopted, nor is he ours. His father was a close family friend, but he died a few years ago and at that time we took him in. He is now twenty, but continues to live with us. He lives in the guest house not the main house, but will stay in the main house quite often. He works as a maintenance man in town doing odd jobs."

I continued to read about their children and stopped once they were listed. "Seven adopted children, and another they raised that lives with them. This is very odd."

I went back to reading, "We allow our children to be together because they aren't related, except for the twins Edward and Renesmee, and Rosalie and Jasper who are siblings."

"Together?" I asked no one. "As in couples?" I pondered aloud before returning to reading. "The children will introduce themselves with their ages once you meet them, so I won't include that. The kids don't ever eat at the same time, so most likely they'll either pick up something or make a sandwich. The only one I ever cook for is Jacob when he's forgotten his lunch after leaving for work. I garden and sketch blueprints during the day, or refinish antiques. I only do that in my free time because with Carlisle's income as a doctor I don't need to work. There are no limits on things such as television, video games, computer time because our kids are very good at time management. They always finish their homework and the only time we've ever been called to school was because of Emmett playing pranks.

"Speaking of Emmett please watch out. He will play harmless pranks quite often and while we don't punish our children often if they do anything too bad this is a list of things that you can take away from each of them. What we consider viable for punishment I assure you Carlisle will explain."

"At least they have some form of punishment, but I haven't heard anything about extracurricular activities. Do these children only play video games or something? My children don't play video games or watch television at all."

I finished the manual and was told to sit in the living room. The family soon entered and my eyes widened. The blonde man at the front extended his hand and shook mine. "I'm Carlisle."

"Rita," I answered shaking his hand. I looked at the eight other people behind him. The first was a tall blonde girl who raised an eyebrow, appraising me before passing me and sitting down on the couch. The huge, imposing man beside her picked me up hugging me tight. I squealed a little.

"I'm Emmett. That's my Rosalie on the couch," he said before putting me down and grinning, joining the annoyed looking woman, well teenager, on the couch.

After them was a little pixie-like girl who could even make me look tall; she wasn't even five foot. "Hi," she said and hugged me excitedly. "I'm Alice and this is Jasper."

"Hello ma'am," he nodded to me and I smiled. At least he had manners.

"Hello," I replied. Alice skipped over to the stairs pulling Jasper with her and sitting underneath them happily.

"I'm Edward," the next guy said and I looked beside him at the dark-haired girl who was looking at me shyly through her lashes.

"Bella," she whispered softly.

I nodded and they moved on, Edward going straight to the piano with Bella following opening a book and beginning to read as he ran his fingers over the piano playing softly.

"I'm Renesmee, but you can call me Nessie," the girl who I'd thought looked so beautiful in the pictures shook my hand professionally and I noticed just how tall the native man beside her was.

"I'm Jacob," the man said and nodded at me.

"Nice to meet all of you," I said tightly. I didn't particularly like this Jacob guy. He looked so much older than the girl who was seated between his legs on the floor. He looked twenty-five, and she was seventeen. I knew he was only twenty, but I still didn't like it. I would kill Maysen if she dated someone more than a year older than her at her age. That would just be asking to be used. If she were older it might be okay, but she wasn't.

"Mom said to tell you our ages," Alice chimed in and began listing them off. "I'm sixteen; the baby of the family." Her laughter chimed through the house softly like bells. "Jazz is seventeen. Rosalie and Emmett are eighteen, and Edward and Bella are seventeen. Renesmee is seventeen and Jacob is twenty, and that's all of us." She fell silent beaming as though she were proud of herself for being the first to chime in. Jasper, beside her, looked uncomfortable.

"I'm sorry for Alice; she's a bit too outgoing sometimes," Carlisle apologized with a deep laugh and a smile for his youngest daughter.

Renesmee laughed at something Jacob had whispered in her ear and I raised an eyebrow. "It's considered disrespectful to talk or laugh while adults are talking," I said as I would at home.

"Excuse me. I'm sorry," Renesmee apologized but I saw the twinkle in her eyes and she pressed a hand to Jacob neck. I ignored the odd action and continued to talk let Carlisle attempt to explain with Alice chiming in every so often.

"Aren't you going to say something to her about interrupting you?" I asked after Alice interrupted for the fifth time.

"She is helping. That's how Alice is," Carlisle shrugged it off and I felt Rosalie's glare intensifying. I looked at her and she stood up quickly. She marched from the room and Emmett was soon following. "I'm apologize for Rosalie. She can take a bit to warm up to you."

Those proved to be the most frustrating hours of my life. Every time someone said something someone else spoke over them. They whispered amongst each other while Carlisle and I attempted to talk and he thought it was absolutely fine. I just couldn't wait to get to sleep that night.

A/N- I hope you enjoyed this chapter and I wanted to say thanks to those of you who have reviewed, added this to your favorites, added me to your favorite authors, etc. That is amazing. I didn't expect that at all. You don't even know how happy I get when I open my eMail and find a bunch of missed eMails about you guys doing all of those things.

Also, I want to ask what your first impression of Rita is now that you've heard something from her POV? More of her is going to come out in the coming chapters, but at this point, what do you think of her?


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